Holy Migraines Batman

I've been dealing with vertigo for the past six months or so.  It was the "I just got off the three hour tour and getting my land legs back" type of vertigo.  Well last Thursday morning, early morning, I rolled over in bed and the whole room started spinning.  Dammit.  I had a neurology appt the following Tuesday and I was hoping to make it there before it got worse.

No luck.  So I called my GP and got in.  I got the usual there's nothing we can do for you but give you some Anti-vert.  Great.  Went home and took Anti-vert. Well that made it worse.....nice.  I was spinning every which way and not sleeping at all.  And got very panicky with it.

Called the GP back on Friday, telling him I was worse......so he sent me for a CT scan at 3:30 (in the afternoon, on a Friday before a long weekend).  He ever so nicely managed to leave me a voicemail on the wrong phone (we asked him to call the cell phone as we were picking up the boy) and said the scan was normal and to hang on til the appt on Tuesday.  Well how nice was that? He managed to leave the message late on Friday and was gone before we could call back.  I had to spend the nice, long weekend spinning and avoiding vomitting all over everything and everyone.....not to mention I had to sleep on the couch, propped up, couldn't even get in my own bed!!!  My neck was killing me too.  I was a big baby too, spent several nights, panicked, sobbing to my husband that no one could help me and I can't live my life this way.........wah wah wah.  Of course the weather was gorgeous most of the weekend and I was stuck mostly in the house. I did manage a few minutes in the sun, but the light was hard to take. 

Finally Tuesday arrives.  I can hardly wait to get to the neurologist. I told hubby (did I mention I couldn't drive either?) if he pulls the "nothing we can do blah blah"  we're driving across the street to the ER and they will have to deal with me, I just can't do this anymore....(insert more pity party here).

This guy was a miracle worker.  Right off the bat he said I'm having migraines.  Now I never really believed in migraines, I had the misconception of people with migraines were slackers, looking for some time off. Suck up the headache and get to work right?  WOW! Was I proved wrong....this guy gave me 12 shots of nerve blockers and within 10 mins I was soooo much better!!! It was amaze-balls!  I couldn't believe it.  The room was clearer, the fog had lifted and the pain in my neck was gone!  I couldn't believe how much better I could see, I wouldn't have told you I wasn't seeing clear before those shots!

I'm off all caffeine, all OTC pain killers and no chiropractor and he put me on PT.  I am taking 5 different meds right now......and I've got shots too.  The shots hurt like a you know what....but man do they work quickly!

I'm back at work. Still got some whoozy times but it's good to be back. I haven't slept in my own bed since last Wed and haven't driven a car either.  So weird to get back behind the wheel.

This was one debillitating illness....I can't believe the GP let me go so long.  I now have to get past this crisis and start to prevent them from happening in the future! 

The Bird Whisperer

Spring sprang early this year.  We've had butterflies for months now.....which is so odd up north here.  Along with that all the flowers and trees bloomed early.  At this rate, the first snowflake will land in late August.  Meh.

And the birds are singing...and mating.  And building nests....in that order.  We don't have too many trees around our house, as the subdivision is too new, but there are few getting big enough for nesting. However, our grill is much more appealing as a home than a plain old oak.....

I bought some mighty fine beer brats (can beer brats be fine?) last week and while simmering them in beer and onions (for god's sake this is not a recipe/cooking/gourmet blog) I headed out to heat up the ole bbq.  I opened the lid and YUCK!!!  It looked like an emu built the king of all nests in the grill.  There were sticks and grass and garbage in there..........not to mention all the sh*t!! Emus poop alot and apparently they like to sh*t where I eat!!

Of course hubby wasn't home yet so I got to clean it up.  I picked out what I could and lit the fire (feathers and poop don't always smell too good lit up on fire either.....) and let it heat up to over 800 degrees, hoping that  bird lice and germs can't survive much over 100 degrees... and eventually slapped the brats on the grill (yes I scrapped it too).  Informed hubby of my massive efforts at dinner and he better damn well enjoy it (I think he gagged it down, his OCD on overtime with bird germs and lice)!

I'll be danged if a week later, I notice the ginormous piles of bird crap all over the patio and all over the grill! Those bastards had started a re-build - they're like FEMA on steroids - swear to God.  And no way was I cleaning it up, this is why we marry guys, so they can clean up after sex crazed emus!

We also got out the plastic owl and tied it to the grill. Oh yeah read the books, birds hate owls.  This one has yellow eyes, very spooky.   It's definitely an emu ass kickin' owl.  I'm confident that our problem is solved.  The birds can go get their freak on over at the neighbors and set up house in their fancy Webber.....and leave my cheap ass Kmart one alone!

Sunday morning.........awwww mother's day.  No one is up yet, let's hear it for some mommy time! I head over the coffee pot and pour myself a cuppa.  I glance out the back window and I'll be damned if it wasn't one of the emus (not sure how to tell naughty bits on an emu?) pecking the crap out of the plastic owl!!  Oh now it's on bitch-chezes!!

Using the superior brain that God gave us humans and not emus, I decided to get one those of metallic spinners to hang near the grill, thinking the light and movement will scare them.  Remember last year, you couldn't swing a dead cat without hitting a metallic wind spinner???  They're really fugly truth be told and you couldn't get thru a store without at least 10 of them whacking you in the head, mostly because you're blinded and dizzy from the spinning or maybe that's just me...anywho..

I cannot find a frickin' metallic spinner to save my ever lovin' life.  Doesn't Walmart breed tacky and cheap???  Walgreens not far behind..Tru Value Hardware and Bag N Save.  Nope, no dice.  I could have bought 20 scary garden gnomes or turtles with solar lights in their shells......seriously.....

I stopped at 5 stores and finally found a stupid looking rainbow thingy, it's just a swirly piece of plastic but it's shiny and it moves and it was only a dollar.  No one will see it but the birds, so I figured why not.

It better work or I'm getting a BB gun.....

Sock Girl The Update

Apparently Spring has warranted a new wardrobe. We no longer have socks.  I am a bit sad, I miss them.  They cheered me up, made a sock girl sighting all that more fun and exciting.

But she has switched up the bling. She now wears 4 or 5 necklaces at a time.....chunky and small and long and short.....

I may have to rename her Bling Girl..........

Brain Fart

I have to admit, the older I get, the more my brain farts (ok so does my rear end but we are ladies and we don't fart, we fluff and we don't discuss such delicate matters  right?).


The boy had a dentist appt.  Because of the extreme trauma involved with a trip to the dentist, he was promised donuts if he was good.  Today the boy was good!  No screaming, no biting of the dentist, no holding down of the boy by the burly dentist.  He earned the donuts. Oh and no cavities! 


So after alex’s dental appt we stop over at Bakers to get him a donut (yeah I know right after the dentist, but hey he didn’t bite the dentist because of the donut) and this gals runs me down in the parking lot  “Peanut, Peanut Hi (not my real name of course she was yelling my real name like it's a big secret huh)”  I had no friggin clue who she was…………..and then she said Pam……….I’m like mmmmhmmm kay….Pam?  What Pam's do I know?


Talk about a complete blank! She had shades on and while that didn't help, there was nothing familiar about this person at all.   I nodded and smiled and chatted about the weather. Thankfully the boy was waving his donuts in her face, so that was a distraction from the fact I was standing in front her with my mouth hanging open.

So I run into work and the first I do is look up Pam’s on FB and the couple in my town aren’t her. Crap.  Who was this person?  Was she my personal genie and I failed to make three wishes?  Did she have a big ole giant check, with many zeros on it, just waiting for me in the back of her suv?


The Pam searched returned friends who have children with down syndrome. Lo and behold, up pops ANNE....


OHHHHHHHH Anne!!! Now I know who she is.....duh. She's the admin for our ds group....


geesh.