OK so the birthday wasn't so bad.

I had lunch with two of my fav BFF's.  I even ate a.......GASP.....dinner roll (and it was heaven). Although I launched an artichoke onto my bff and then the floor....long story but it's good to know I'm talented.

I got a rather large birthday cookie from my contracting company (it's the only time they come through let me tell you, although a pay raise would be nicer than a cookie and I wouldn't have to share with my co-workers) and some birthday wishes from the co-prisoners er workers and some guesses on how old I am.  I took the mid 30's and ran with it.........ROTFL.

Took the boy for his haircut. It was only a minor exorcism this time, no pea soup. 

Then of course Hu Hot with the girl and the boy.  And over to see the new puppies of the oldest boy and the girl.  They are cute but tons of work.  The cat is not impressed and sat in the back hallway, wishing us all an untimely and painful death, I could read it in his yellow eyes (might need another exorcism stat).

Got sniffed up and down by my two dogs when I got home, as I smelled of new puppies and a cat. (Who would pass up a wet dog nose stuck in your crotch?????  Apparently the big dog thought I hid these new puppies up in my errrr.......hu hah....like that's a good place to store puppies right?) And got some sweet cards from the boy and the hubby. 

I got over 103 birthday wishes on Facebook.  I feel part of the in crowd now.  I have friends!

So it wasn't a horrible birthday......I have to admit.

Suckiest Birthday EVER!

I know, I sound like a whiney two year old.....but it is MY birthday and everyone should stop what they're doing and LOOK at me!!!!  Shower me with the finest gifts and much attention. It's all about me!!! (the tootsie rolls the little white dog left in the spare bedroom do NOT count as gifts)

My two big kids are going out of town with their PITA dad for a family reunion and hubby has to work late. I have to take the boy to get a haircut, alone.  While that sounds innocuous....you've never taken my kid for a haircut. It's like taking Linda Blair to an exorcism.  Complete with pea soup vomit - the head spinning is a given.

The only person who wants to spend the day with me??? Aunt Flo.  Yup, wrap up the kotex with a pretty red bow, break out the tequila and Midol and we've got us a par-tay. Party of one apparently.  Wah.

So I'm off to pout to work where no one knows it's my birthday and I'll keep it that way.  I'm light years older than anyone else there, best to just sit and feel ignored and neglected.

In all fairness, I think the daughter is staying behind and she (after much begging and guilt tripping on my part) agreed to meet the boy and I at Hu Hot. Yeah I live the fast life.

It only happens to me

I swear I draw them in.  Like bees to the honey.  In swarms.

Ya'll know my car went kurplump right?  Well it did, so I took into the shop Wednesday. I had to drive for four more days, wondering and praying it would start each time I took it out. Always a nice added stress to the 110 heat index days we're having.  Finally I limped it into the dealership (from hell).  Naturally the hubby wasn't going to help me out (well it's YOUR car) so I had to rely on the courtesy van.

Now you know you can get the super hot, Brad Pitt dead ringer for a driver or you get the serial killer.  I'm sorry or happy to say I got neither. I got Grandpa. 

Now Grandpa was a nice guy as he came and got us (there was another guy needin' a ride too, apparently his Hyundai sucks eggs too) and he said I have the car today. So I head out of the lobby, expecting a ride in one of the brand spankin' new Hyundai's.  Ummmm.......I look around and all I see is a 1978 Olds.  Oh yes this was my chariot of fire.  So I head for the front seat, not sure of the etiquette but I didn't want to ride in the back seat with a complete stranger either.  Lo and behold! Grandpa has the heater on.  I wanted to say well dude it is only 78 out this morning, with 95% humidity, so I can see how you're a bit chilly, but I refrained.  After all, he was nice enough to haul me around in his stunning 1978 gold Oldsmobile land yacht!

So we head off, a full 20 mph, with the heater.  As we near the main road, he finally decides maybe we could some air.  Maybe it was my face sliding off onto my shirt, I don't know.  Then he makes the brillant decision that I get to go first and he's taking the interstate!  I was wishing I had my rosary beads with me at this point and then he starts in on "the good old days." Oh yeah.......his days stationed in San Antonio in 1960.  He was sure things have changed since then (ummm ya think? Maybe they have indoor plumbing now???) and how he chased pretty girls. Now I'm worried I got Grandpa Dexter....as we pass the entrance to the interstate. Guess we're taking the back roads.  He figured it out 6 blocks later and finally at least started heading south, which is where my place of employment lies.  Progress.

So we continue with football next. When talking about Texas in Nebraska, it always ends up with football.  Sigh.  I was being nice while hoping he wasn't inching over closer to me. I put one hand on the door handle just in case......

So next we decide we could now hit the interstate from "L" street.  Except Gramps remains in the right head lanes and turning left requires you to get into the left lanes..which we I desperated needed to go left and end this ride.  So he's yakkety yakking about University of Texas football team and I point out over the steering wheel...LEFT!!!!  We barely it made it over.  We never got above 30 mph so thankfully it wasn't a two wheel off the pavement type manuveur.

At least the interstate. Dare I say the car actually cruised at 50??  We managed to make it to the front door of work (I was never so happy to have not been driven into the woods and chopped up into pieces in my life and actually make it into work) and I hopped out.  Grandpa was still going on and on about football as I slammed the door.

I did thank him.  It was an interesting ride.  No wiccan license plates or anything either. And no he didn't come to pick me up after work, I got Jerry.  Ole Jer was pretty normal and quiet and had a new mini van. With AC.  Much better.

Vacation Recap or I Need a Vacation from Vacation.

Isn't it the truth?  You get home totall exhausted, knowing you go back to work the next day and you can barely lift your tooshie off the couch??? And the laundry pile looks like Pikes Peak?  I promised a recap and I'll keep it brief.

Alex melted down. The End.

No seriously, he had more meltdowns than Baskin Robbins in the Saraha.  It was not fun.  And he's not going on vacation again.  When the stewardess comes stands by your row on the plane, you know you're about to face a federal marshall.  Yeah he was that bad. 

I posted my favorite pics below if you wanna see those.  Thought I'd recap a few more below.

Day 1

Johnson City. Home of LBJ. Well resting place now.  This was the plane he used.  A bit of trivia, he conducted most of his White House duties in Texas. Hence the name, The Texas White House.  He had a runway built so dignitaries could come to him.

The final stop.  I took pictures of the house, but alas, great photographer and electronics user that I am, they're all black and white and I haven't uploaded them yet. So you get hubby's and he didn't take pics of the house.  Pretty family cemetary on the ranch.  Interesting visit.  I'll have to mention the dead presidents tour hubby and I do. 

Day Two

Morgan's Wonderland.  A neat totally accessible park.  First of it's kind. About time people!

Alex loved the carousel and yes that's me.....riding the Tiger....Meow!

One more of the scuplture at the entrance.  I highly recommend it for our kids!

Day Three

That was the trip to Gruene, TX.  Mom and I went alone, thank God!  Steve and Alex did laundry at the hotel.  The pics are below (a few of my favorite things....).

Day Four

Wildlife Safari!

A cute little baby zebra! How often do you get to pet a baby Zebra (yeah me either!).  The ostrich sticking his head in the window wasn't as appealing.....

I have pictures of Riverwalk but as before, I haven't uploaded them yet.  It's water and tons of restaurants.  I noticed the hubby didn't capture the Alamo...I guess he forgot (pun intended!).

That was it for our vacation.  I may post some more pics if and when I get them on the 'puter.  That laundry pile has grown yet again.......

Vacation

I want to blog a bit about vacation but just haven't had the time nor the energy.  Thought I'd throw you a friggin bone though....

This is one of my favorite pics (and I didn't get my finger or my mom's rear end in the shot!).  It's an old gristmill in Gruene Tx.  My mom and I ate lunch here.  Neat place.  The town is all antique shops and quirkly little mom and pop shops.  Enjoyed it!

Here's another fav of mine, also in Gruene.

It's a really cool B&B.  Had I known about it, we could have stayed there!  duh.

I better get back to work....more later.

Something Wicked This Way Comes

We are interrupting this blog to bring you an important post.  Well I mean I haven't had the energy to post about vacation but I just had to post about my trip to Lincoln tonight.

It was time to take Grandma home. She went with us on vacation and frankly she was sick of us.  Can't say I blame her.    We were going to meet up at my brother's house in Lincoln (so my dad could pick her up it's half way and my dad hates driving in Omaha) and they were nice enough to grill some brats for us.  Alex loves their dog, Pinnie, too. She's a hyper (I use that term loosely) Viszula and Alex thinks that's the neatest thing, a jumpy, piddling dog - the dog has a very severe case of ADHD.  So off in the car we went, thunderstorm warnings and all.

It started raining when we left, but nothing serious.  As soon as we got to my brother's house, my dad aka Weatherman is already warning us about the storms coming.  My dad also hates any kind of weather.....I think even a perfect 75 degree, sunshiny day will get him all itchy...so we got the weather report. We better hurry and eat and head home.  Well ok, there was a tornado warning to the west of there, but it was a ways yet.  My poor brother and SIL slapped on the beans and chips and brats and we shoved them down and literally ran out the door.  Downing a brat and a half that fast is not good for someone who has reflux.....belch.

It was lightening pretty good and dark enough for headlights.  My dad was sitting in his car, yelling at me to back the hell out so he could go!!! LOL  He cracks me up.

Man did the wind start in and then rain. The clouds were ominous to the west.  Thankfully we're heading east, so we'll outrun it right (if you know new math, a tornado heading east at 150 mph and a car heading east at 65 mph, leave Lincoln...at what point do the people in the car die?)

So it's raining like a mad bastard and I can barely see. If you've had lasik surgery like I have, you may be able to see in the distance, but you cannot see shit on a rainsoaked interstate!  I'm hoping I'm staying in my lane. Thankfully I pull up closer to a car in front of me (so I can tailgate and hope to hell they don't head for the ditch, cause I'm right behind 'em).  OMG.  Her license plate????  WICCAN 1.  I am tailgating a witch in a tornado.  I cursed the Gods who won't release the last Harry Potter til the 15th, cause I sure as hell can't remember my Patronas and I think I might need one now. 

Flying 65 down a wet windy interstate behind a witch tends to un-nerve one a tad bit (did I mention my already white knuckle death grip on the steering wheel???). I can barely see ahead but I suddenly see swirls of black clouds........in all that is the baby Jesus, Mary and Joseph....I swear it's (you think tornado right?) Dementors!! All swishy and swirling around my car and the Wiccan's car!!!  Where is my wand?  I'm doomed.  I've gone thru how many years of Hogwars with those Weasleys and I can't remember one damn spell, all I can think of is Quiddich, epic Potter fail.  Until I realize that a coal train is running along side the road and the wind is blowing coal off the top..............

Who's the drama queen? 

The Wiccan exited at the wildlife safari and South Bend (home of the Testicle Festival I kid you not!) and I wondered if I should follow her or stay on the interstate.  I stayed on.  I was driving straight down the middle of what I thought was 3 lanes.....and I guess I was ok cause I made it home in one piece.  

I'm just glad the pictures hanging on my wall aren't moving around and talking to me......